The (Playa) Dust Has Settled.
Well...how was it??
Two weeks have gone by since the dust has settled from Burning Man and I have more than procrastinated writing up what it was all about.
I think it’s because Burning Man is so radically different for everyone, I didn’t want to describe it as something it wasn’t for somebody else. And for someone who uses a ridiculous quantity of words both in voice & written throughout the day, I couldn't come up with any.
But, you guys asked and I believe that part of humanity is about shared experiences and transparency.
What I came to terms with is all that I could offer were the takeaways that I experienced in this season of life, through my life’s lens so if you’ve been following the journey and want the scoop continue reading.
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What is Burning Man?
A temporary metropolis in the middle of the desert dedicated to community, art, self-expression, self-reliance, gifting, decommodification and immediacy.
Logistically speaking, it’s a few hours outside of Reno, NV in the desert where people bring in everything they need to camp for the week. Camping being everything from tents, yurts, RV’s or what they call billionaire’s row where the Silicon Valley guys and celebs bring in full staff to set up and tear down luxury compounds. It takes place the week before Labor Day and contrary to the common misconception, it’s not a festival like Coachella. The only infrastructure laid out ahead of time is the grid of streets, port a potties and ice for sale. Everything else you are responsible for bringing and taking back out with you. There are no hired music performers, yet there is music everywhere. They go based off a system called the 10 Principles.
For me, the best description of Burning Man is that it is a social experiment on the grandest of scales.
Tickets sell out within minutes and I would fondly refer to Burning Man Prep as my side gig because there is A LOT involved in getting your camp ready.
When you mention to someone you’re going to Burning Man, the common response was, “oh the hippie thing with all the drugs and orgies in the desert?”
But with 70K people in attendance, no crime to speak of and more and more families going, I knew it had to be more than that.
The catch phrase that I had heard from previous attendees is that it is exactly what you make of it.
If you want to go and party & indulge in all of the otherwise forbidden fruits of the world, you will find your people. If you want to go and zen out with yoga workshops and meditating in the temple, you will find your people. If you are a creative type and geek out on the art installations, you will run out of time before seeing everything.
So what attracted me to want to go?
I am drawn to adventure and new experiences (within reason lol).
I had heard from all walks of life how life changing it was so I was expecting some type of profound spiritual awakening.
It would force me to truly unplug for a week since there is no cell service.
The art.
Being in a somewhat new romantic relationship, I figured it would be one of those experiences that either strengthen our bond or polarized us and I was curious to find out which one.
For each point I mention below the person standing next to me could argue they had the completely opposite experience.
What Brought Me Joy:
THE PEOPLE. Seeing people radically different, not just ‘get along’ but intimately connect through conversation, acceptance, and sharing of life. Connecting with 60 new strangers at our camp from all walks of life, ages, backgrounds and locations was greatly enriching and I am deeply grateful that I was invited to participate.
GENDERLESS CONVERSATIONS. There are stereotypes surrounding how men talk amongst themselves and how women talk amongst themselves, but the best way that I can describe it is that both sides cut out the small talk and spoke freely and intentionally.
THE OUTFITS. They are technically not called costumes because that would insinuate that you were dressing up as someone besides yourself, but people go ALL out and/or choose to wear very little at all. The theater kid in me had so much fun picking out different statement pieces, accessories and face paint stencils. BM can be a highly sexualized experience for some people, but for me, after the first day of having adolescent giggles seeing a small population in their birthday suits, it didn’t even register the rest of the week.
JAKE. They call it the Burning Man Couples Curse. If there are any cracks in the fault line most duos come back as singles. Why? On the dramatic side, some couples show up not knowing the other partner wants to have polyamorous encounters. Or if one partner wants to party all night and the other one wants to meditate all day, it can be cause for resentment or neglect. Or most common, you are in entirely uncomfortable living conditions with lack of sleep, the desert heat, no privacy, emotions running high and low and you’re with your partner 24/7. I am proud to say WE SOARED. (well on day 7, I bit his head off for not allowing us to stop by camp during an afternoon bike ride to get snacks). He is all the things I didn’t think were possible.
BIKING + ART. Biking around to see art installations. The art installations are even more spectacular and awe-inspiring than you see through social media photos, but I think a big part of it for me was where they were located. Most of the zoned area set aside is set up like a city packed with camps, food options, bars, entertainment, acrobatics, performance spaces, art cars, etc., but if you bike outside of that area, you find the Playa where it’s WIDE OPEN. Any chance I got I would hop on my bicycle, either with camp friends, just Jake & I or just me and ride for as long as far as I could to see the art and feel just how expansive this world is.
OFF THE GRID. I run my business online and truly LOVE what I do. So much so that the lines of working hours and non-working hours are blurry at best. Even though I travel extensively for work and family, I haven’t taken an actual vacation since my honeymoon 5 years ago and a day off in 2 ½ years. There is no cell service/wifi out in the middle of nowhere which sent sheer panic through every fiber of my being, but it ended up being the most rewarding recharge.
What was confusing:
PLAYA DUST. Every pore on your body is COVERED in playa dust (less like dirt, more like flour consistency). You are FILTHY and for some reason it’s ok. We were some of the fortunate ones that had access to a shower in our RV, but it was fruitless, the second you got out, you’d be covered head to toe within minutes. Playa dust is like dry shampoo on steroids so you’re not greasy or smelly, just dusty.
EVERYTHING A PARADOX. How a culture of people on questionable substances, lack of sleep, and hydration at any given time could be so, well, responsible. “Leave no trace” is an understatement. People come to a screeching halt on their bicycles to pick up a single fallen sequin and rake their campsites with a fine tooth comb to make sure that it was exactly how they had found it, all while nursing a hangover.
ALL OF IT. At any given moment. In the best and weirdest of ways. I think.
What was hard:
EDM. Electronic Dance Music playing 24 hours a day at level 10 competing with the camp or art car next to them. Some of this can be avoided based on your camp location, but it’s a bit aggressive at 7am.
MOM. I attended Burning Man six months after my Mom passed away unexpectedly to a heart attack. At the end of the week they burn down the main attraction - the man. Just as many people travel near and far to come spend time in the Temple, as the main event. This is a place that acts as a large memorial for people to leave photos, letters, trinkets, basically anything to either celebrate a loved one's life or leave a grievance behind. I came prepared for the gravity of what that symbolized.
I waited until the second day when I could sneak off by myself and have some time there alone. In full dramatic fashion, I walked in, eyes to the heavens, ready to be overcome by emotion and...crickets. I’m not a terribly emotional person as it is, but I felt... nothing. Huh. Maybe I am a sociopath?
But later in the week our group was out having a wonderful time looking at art installments lit up late at night and it hit me. (This is going to sound looney tunes so bear with me.) Everyone had described Burning Man as this magical place where weird shit happens and I think on some subconscious level, I thought I would find her there. But by the end of the week, I had seen a lot of what was there and experienced what it was all about, and she didn’t show up. I went to the Temple for the second time that week at midnight and crumbled. I spent hours reading every letter on the wall that was addressed to a Mom and cried the past six months worth of tears.
Overall conclusions:
Was it worth it? Every penny.
Was it fun? Yes.
Was it challenging? At times.
Was it profound? Sliding scale. If there are things you haven’t confronted or aren’t aware of inside of you, it has a way of bringing all of that up to the surface. If you dig in on a regular basis, it’s not as shocking.
Would I go again? Depends on the day you’re asking. :)
