It's hard and you can do it.
When my friend Alisha nonchalantly asked me to hike Mount Whitney with her a couple months ago, I responded with an excited “HECK YES,” not quiiiiiite realizing the possibility of actually getting a pass.
My brother Drew is basically a pro camper and a pro hiker of massive peaks. He is the hiker of the family and I am the Pilates, woo-woo, stay at sea-level one of the family. So when we found out that we were awarded a pass, to hike on Mother’s Day of all days, I took it as a message from my Mom and immediately committed. I mean, I could sit in my backyard flipping through every Instagram picture of my friends spending the day with their moms. Or I could do something challenging, that my mom is literally willing me to do, and use it as an opportunity to connect with her. I’d say the second option sounds a bit better.
Mount Whitney is the highest summit you can climb in the contiguous United States coming in at 14,500 feet. It requires serious gear, preparation, and a certain physical condition. So here I am, less than one week out of one of the scariest things I’ll ever do, flipping between the thoughts of “What the hell are you doing?” and “You can do hard things”. I am definitely nervous, anxious, and if I’m being honest, a bit scared. Some days I ask myself why I am doing this hike. I am doing the hike because I’ve learned through experience that happiness, freedom, and healing are on the other side of fear.
There are three ways we can move forward in our physical health, our emotional health and our business, by overcoming fear and doing what scares us.
1. Overcome fear of physically hard things.
Exhibit A: Hiking Mount Whitney.
Exhibit B: The women I talk to daily, including the one I used to be, who tell me they are “too out of shape,” “too embarrassed to go to a gym,” or “too” of any other fear: old, tired, busy, you name it. I get it, you’re scared. Scared to get hurt. Scared to be a beginner, scared to add another thing to your busy schedule. I’ve been there, too. When I owned a Pilates and Barre studio, I refused to do any other kind of workout, because I was absolutely terrified of being a beginner again. This fear kept me at a plateau. I couldn’t see the potential strength in my body, and I couldn’t reach my health and fitness goals. Once I overcame that fear and start a new type of workout, my body rewarded me and thanked me, just like yours will if you try, whatever it is that you are scared to try. I’m not saying it’s not hard to try a new workout or activity. I’m saying it’s hard and you can do it.
2. Overcome fear of moving on from a relationship.
The last year of my marriage was spent in survival mode. Working so hard, using every bone in my body, just to breathe at the surface. So when the marriage came to an end, I proclaimed 2018 as the year I focused on myself without distraction. In reality, I was also scared. Scared to meet someone, scared to feel excited about someone, and scared to be vulnerable with another human being. SO MANY of the women who have gone through a divorce or a bad breakup tell me they’re in that same place. They’re stuck there, scared to open themselves up to another person again.
But what happens if we let go of that fear, and let the universe do the work for us? If we don’t ignore the cute guy at the table near us at Starbucks or pretend not to be interested in the funny guy at the pool party? What happens is that we allow space for the right person to come into our lives, to make us laugh again, to make us feel again. But if we stay stuck, and scared, floating on the surface, if we never dive down again, out of fear, we will never know those feelings. I’m not saying it’s not hard to move on from a failed relationship. I’m saying it’s hard and you can do it.
3. Overcome fear of what you need to do to advance your business.
I mentor about 10 women each month on starting their own health and fitness coaching business, and I collaborate with about 20 others on a regular basis. The most common thing that holds me, and all of these women, back from our success is fear. In the beginning of my business, I was scared of what people thought of it, of me. I was scared I’d fail and be judged. I was scared I’d waste my time. If you follow me on instagram, you probably notice that I really am not scared of judgement anymore. I bare it all and I share it all. Why? Because once I started being real, and authentic, people started opening up to me that they felt the same, and they needed help. And this was what made me realize my impact and my potential for success. Overcoming this fear is what brought me to be an Elite coach, in the top 1% of the company I partner with. I’m not saying it’s not hard to overcome your fears of starting a business or advancing your business. I’m saying it’s hard, and you can do it.
I hope that if nothing else, you’ve left reading this post inspired to do what makes you uncomfortable. Do what you aren’t sure you’re ready for and what gives you goosebumps. I promise you, on the other side of that fear, is growth, happiness, and freedom.